Happy Thursday loves!! I hope you have been enjoying your weeks thus far!
I wanted to touch on something I have struggled with, and something I am working on in my life currently. Fear. And not letting fear dictate the choices I make.
When we think of fear, we typically think of what makes us afraid. Things we don’t want to do, things that make us nervous and send a shiver up our spine. So our natural instinct is to obviously avoid those things. Because the thought of doing what makes us afraid is uncomfortable. It feels unnatural. And as humans we love our comfort zone, and we like knowing what to expect.
There are a whole bunch of things I’m afraid of, and I’m sure there are a lot of things you all are afraid of as well. It is 100% normal to have fears. But what is not normal is to let those fears dictate your life.
I’m afraid of failure. I’m afraid of disappointing not only others, but also myself. I have a whole bunch of fears surrounding relationships after my past one. I have fears of what the future will hold. I am afraid that I am not going to end up in the career I want, that I won’t get accepted into yoga teacher training or my internship. I have a whole bunch of fears.
I was talking to my therapist about some of these the other day during our session. I told her that I just didn’t want to talk or get involved with any guys for a long time and would block out any emotions I had towards someone to avoid getting hurt. And she kinda just smirked at me like a “cmon Lyss ya know that sounds silly.” And I was like ya no it doesn’t. But then after talking more through it, I realized how I was letting fear dictate my life and my choices.
“Delight yourself in the LORD & he will give you the desires of your heart.”
We cannot give fear the power to paralyze us. I have done that in the past. Whether it was the fears surrounding food and my body when I was deep in my eating disorder, the fear of trying new activities or hanging out with different people, the fear of getting my feelings hurt by a guy; I ran away from those fears and avoided all of those things. And instead of tackling them I let them control the way I lived my life. And clearly, that wasn’t effective.
“What we fear of doing most is usually what we most need to do.”
This past semester I did what I feared, and I needed to do that. I needed to get in that relationship, because I needed to discover more about myself. Just from being with that person for a short three months, I learned so incredibly much about myself, what I value, and the way I want to be treated. Did the outcome suck? Yeah! But it is what I needed to do. I needed to do what I feared so I could GROW AND BLOSSOM.
I think what is so crucial to remember is that conquering our fears is going to help us in the long run no matter what the outcome may me. If things go well when you face your fears, you will grow. And if things don’t go well, you will also grow. So there is nothing to lose. Because we ultimately become a better version of ourselves when we face our fears. But when we don’t and we hide behind them, there is no room for self-improvement. And isn’t that the point of life? To better ourselves each and every single day?? I sure think so. I know that’s what I strive for. In the morning when I wake up I ask myself, “How can I be a better Lyss than I was the day before?”
“Which do you want: the pain of staying where you are, or the pain of growth?”
Of course, growth is freakin’ painful sometimes. God, it was painful for me this past month/two months. But I needed that pain to get where I am right now.
So by the end of my therapy session, I was like you know what you are 100% right. I can’t just avoid the things I am afraid of the rest of my life and hide behind a wall. Sure, my main goal is in no way getting a boyfriend; but I can’t be afraid of relationships and have the belief that each and every one of them is bad. Because that isn’t true. I can’t let fear dictate the way I view my life, I can’t let fear dictate my decisions or take away from my positivity.
however you need
I am a firm believer that God and the universe works wonders on each and every one of us. God has a plan that is so much greater than we could ever imagine. And that plan involves fear. Pain. Hurt. Tears. Anger. Frustration. But that plan also involves growth. Smiles. Laughter. Joy. And that’s what makes God’s plan just so freakin’ beautiful in my eyes.
Now tell me:
What is one thing that helps you overcome fear?
Have a great day loves. Hope you get in a good belly laugh today and splurge on a Kombucha. 🙂
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