Pain Enables Growth

August 21, 2017 in Recovery


“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”

-Maya Angelou 

The hurt I have experienced in this life has most definitely changed me. I am not the same person I was before I was shattered into billions of pieces. I will never be the same young girl with an innocent heart and a soft smile.

If you follow me on Instagram (@blissful_lyss29), I posted a poem I wrote on a similar topic Sunday night shining light on my imperfect, fallible, and unglamorous story in this 20 years on earth thus far. Filled with pain, struggle, confusion, anxiety, darkness, self-defeating thoughts, and a lack of purpose: my story is chaotic and I have been lost on this road so many times. When we experience any sort of trauma, we are going to be changed. Hard times in life provoke shifts in our lives.

We have a conscious say in how we let our obstacles impact us. Just like Maya Angelou said, we can be changed by what happens to us, but we should never be reduced by it. 

Do you know what is so lovely about hardships? Growth. We become wiser, we become more resilient, we are filled to the cup with tenacity. Without the universe throwing us pain, how would we be able to cultivate so much power? I believe the universe never gives us more than we are capable of handling. Even when our hurt becomes so intense and our lives become so messy, we are able to bounce back.


“The world gives you so much pain and here you are making gold out of it.”

-Rupi Kaur

Make gold out of your adversities. Do not look at your hardships with the mentality that “this is not fair.” That will not help you blossom. Shift your thinking. Look at your pain with the mindset that this will catapult you into something wonderful. Do not let your struggles put you at a stand-still. Nothing in life is capable of dragging you down unless you let it.


“Magic happens when you do not give up even though you want to. The universe always falls in love with a stubborn heart.” 

Let the universe fall in love with your determination. Let it be in complete admiration of your relentlessness to flourish despite your battered and bleeding heart.

I have let my hurt change me, but I will never let it make me smaller. I will never let what has happened to me trim down my unique edges. I am not ashamed of my hardships. I am not embarrassed that my eating disorder, anxiety, and depression generated years of struggle and tears. These illnesses will never define me, yet they have guided me into a more enlightened human with a whole lot more love for herself and the world.


“Pain can change you, but that doesn’t mean it has to be a bad change. Take that pain and turn it into wisdom.” 


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Youtube: Alyssa Cristadoro

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  • Reply Stephanie August 21, 2017 at 11:40 am

    Who is this girl you are? I am so proud of what you have become in spite of what you have been through, you have made gold out of your adversities! Now you are spreading that wealth of knowledge to others! So wonderful!

    • Reply Alyssa August 24, 2017 at 1:25 pm

      love you. thanks for being a part of this journey.

  • Reply Mackenzie August 22, 2017 at 4:35 pm

    So well written, Lyss. <3 So many, including myself, need to hear and relate to this!

    • Reply Alyssa August 24, 2017 at 1:25 pm

      thank you Mackenzie!!

  • Reply kat August 22, 2017 at 11:02 pm

    I love this post girl. I, like you, am not ashamed of my many scars. In fact, I find them to be badges of honor. They are a roadmap of the journey I have been on in life – of pain, growth and self-discovery. Though I would never wish hardships on anyone, it truly is amazing how we can flourish through them and grow from them.
    kat recently posted…Vegan Banana Flour BrowniesMy Profile

    • Reply Alyssa August 24, 2017 at 1:27 pm

      We can most definitely grow from them- and I think that is just so beautiful.

  • Reply Emily August 22, 2017 at 11:39 pm

    I’m thankful that God uses the fire to refine the dross out of me. If it weren’t for the fire, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.
    Emily recently posted…How Other Bloggers Have Helped My Recovery JourneyMy Profile

  • Reply Liz Teaches August 23, 2017 at 6:19 am

    I too give a different approach to the pain. Pain has the power to either break or make us. We need to choose what we want out from the pain.

    • Reply Alyssa August 24, 2017 at 1:28 pm

      yesss!!! I love the way you think

  • Reply Claire B. August 24, 2017 at 12:58 am

    So so true! I remarked to my dad the other day that one reason change is so hard–an accident, a diagnosis, a disease–is that it’s like a gate closing behind you. It emphasizes that you can’t go back to how things used to be anymore, so you have to change.
    Claire B. recently posted…10 Food Staples that are Easy & Cheap to Make from ScratchMy Profile

    • Reply Alyssa August 24, 2017 at 1:29 pm

      It is like a gate closing behind you- I love that comparison. thank you for reading Claire <3
      Alyssa recently posted…Thinking Out Loud 8/24My Profile

  • Reply Catherine @ A Cup of Catherine August 25, 2017 at 2:17 am

    This is beautiful, Lyss.
    Even at 33, I struggle to accept that the bad must coexist with the good. But it’s the only way to grow and relate and thrive!
    Catherine @ A Cup of Catherine recently posted…Currently // August 2017My Profile

    • Reply Alyssa August 27, 2017 at 2:17 am

      that means a lot to me Catherine. <3 thank you for reading love

  • Reply Kristy from Southern In Law August 27, 2017 at 9:27 am

    You are so wise beyond your years, sweet friend! I love you for embracing you ❤️
    Kristy from Southern In Law recently posted…Recent Things: Books, Blossoms and Board GamesMy Profile

    • Reply Alyssa August 27, 2017 at 11:49 am

      so grateful for your kindness <3

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