For a long long time, I felt so insecure in this life. I felt lost, lost with who I was as a person. I felt confused that I was placed on this Earth and could not discover who I was. But the thing is, I am constantly evolving. Changing with each day, each year; growing into the person I am meant to be.
I am different than I was last year. I am different than I was last semester. But I love it- I love who I am becoming.
I love how I take off by myself and sit by a lake and just think- think about what I can add to this world, think about how beautiful this Earth is and how I am so grateful to be a part of it. I love taking off by myself during the afternoon to a park and doing yoga for an hour in my favorite Lulu Lemon sports bra and Nahko playing in the background.
I love the relationships I have. The feeling of human connection. Being able to eat kale salads and drink smoothies with my best friend then just sit by a lake and talk about life. I love the freedom of eating a cookie at 12:30 am with my friends and not letting it nag at my brain like it used to. I love going out with my best friend and just laughing without a care in the world. These relationships with others are ones that bring me great joy. The people that have entered into my life this year are one’s I know God placed there for a reason.
I love that I want to do more. That I am not okay with the injustices our world is facing. For that uneasiness in my stomach drives me to want to change the world, to want to positively impact it in some way.
I love that I am different. That I get a dreadlock in my hair, that I have three tattoos, that I have my nose pierced.
I love this blog- for it gives me an outlet to share some of the thoughts that are constantly flowing around my brain, and it allows me to to connect with other like-minded souls. I adore writing, I adore the freedom that picking up a pencil and a piece of paper can do for me. I adore the effortlessness that comes in opening up my laptop and writing on the notes of my computer- no judgment, no criticism; just myself and the words that flow from my brain.
I love that I am no longer the food I eat. I am no longer my body. I am no longer the workout I do, or the amount of minutes I spend in the gym. I am Alyssa- the girl with a big heart, a wanderer, a thinker. I am so much more than what my 16 year old self ever envisioned me to be.
I am just doing me. I am progressing, I am emerging into something I never thought I would. I am embracing- embracing my setbacks, embracing the messiness, embracing the difficulties placed in my path. I am surpassing the woman my high school self thought I would be. My independence and confidence growing, my understanding of the world improving.
I am just doing me. Not anyone else, not working to please anyone else. Just doing me, making me content in this crazy world.
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