Hi guys and happy Thursday! Time to think out loud this week and ramble. That’s what I do best! Lol. Thank you Amanda for letting me share what’s on my mind today and the link up!
But the serving size says _. Serving sizes. We love to freak out about them. We love to analyze them, calculate them, measure our foods so they fit that exact portion. We love to talk to others about how the serving size for this snack is 2 so only eat half the bag, we love to fixate on this number. We love to talk about how many calories are in each serving size. How many carbs, grams of protein, sugar, blah blah blah. Ugh, serving sizes man.
They get obsessive and they get blown out of hand. The brain can get fixated on this number very quickly and easily. What happened to just listening to our bodies though? Having how much we want. Stopping when we don’t want any more. Not measuring every little morsel of food that goes into our mouth to make sure it’s the exact serving size.
I was like that. Victim of measuring, victim of being dictated by the serving size on the back of the passage; victim of being controlled by this number and becoming obsessed with having that and JUST that- nothing more, but of course I could have less. It was a trap of self-hate. I felt trapped in my brain and controlled by numbers. The measuring of food that I did for every time I ate was incredibly time consuming. It dictated my life. I would remeasure things about 5 times making sure everything was exact. Everything had to be perfectly measured, the serving size I aimed for had to be exact. It took a toll on my brain and mental health, yet it didn’t influence me to stop. It was addictive. Measuring everything was extremely addictive. The fear of having a tiny bit more than what I anticipated was so big that I let it control me and my health; the fear of going over what the serving size was or the new “smaller serving size” I created for myself was tremendous. So I continued to follow these strict rules for myself until I finally received the help that I needed. I continued to measure everything. I practically remembered the nutritional information of every single food that I ate. It was extremely unhealthy and not a good way to live at all.
Every time I see someone glancing over the nutrition info or talking about serving sizes, my automatic instinct is to get nervous for them; to yell at them and just say, “You don’t need to stare at those nutrition facts for so long!! Please don’t, it doesn’t matter that much!” When I hear people talking about this, I always put in my two cents and just remind everyone that BALANCE is key to all this nutrition stuff, to all this talk on food and serving sizes. Half the time this just goes over people’s heads. In one ear and out the other. For example, I gave a friend one of my Lenny & Larry’s cookies to try. This friend can sometimes be a bit more ignorant about topics of food/diet/exercise, but we all have those friends and I just roll with it now. Let that person live their life and you focus on yours instead, doing what is best for YOU! Anyways, this friend looked at the back of the cookie and saw it was two serving sizes. She was reading over the other nutrition facts-protein, carbs, etc. etc. and said “Oh gosh, I’ll just have half of this tonight!! All this protein before bed would be bad.” I honestly laugh at these comments now. My other friend said, “Who eats half a cookie?” HELL YA MAN- WHO REALLY DOES?! I always eat the full Lenny & Larry’s cookie. I don’t care it says 2 serving sizes. I want the full cookie! Like my friend said, who really just wants 1 half of the cookie when you can have both?! Who would put the other half back and just save it for later?! My friend’s comment about the serving size of these cookies in a ways inspired this post, so every little irritating thing and everything in general does in fact happen for a reason hehe. I have a voice, and I’m not afraid to use it anymore in these conversations and topic matters or on my blog for that matter. I am not triggered by what those say in regards to this topic of conversation or any topic regarding food or exercise, but it can obviously get frustrating just from my background. But I am going to stand up for what I believe in. Others can stand up for what they believe in with these matter and I will respect that, just as I will stand up for what I think is right too. I never want to silence my voice with these issues, cuz I got a wholeeee lot to say lol.
I think the big thing I’ve learned is that serving sizes and numbers aren’t the devil. They aren’t bad! They are just numbers. Sure, I’ll look at serving sizes sometimes. Because quite frankly, it isn’t healthy to eat a whole bag of chips or 5 servings of oreos. Living a balanced life for me consists of eating what the “typical” amount is for something. However, that is more than the serving size sometimes! But other times, that is also less than the serving size. Another thing is that I do not measure my food anymore. Sure, when I am baking or cooking I measure it. But not for everyday purposes. I do not pull out the tablespoon measure for my nut butter anymore and spend 5 minutes making sure the amount is exact. Instead, I just get a spoon and dip it in that peanut butter, and just have that spoonful. It is so much easier and freeing that way. Not measuring food was hands down one of the most greatest things about recovery; it was an amazing sense of freedom, it was like flipping off all those tablespoons and teaspoons and measuring cups and being like “Adios!! See you for when I’m baking a cake or making some banana bread. Besides then, I don’t care about you anymore!!” Learning to trust my body, to trust my judgment, and to not let small things such as serving sizes and numbers dictate my happiness was the greatest decision and stride in my recovery. It gave me an everlasting sense of empowerment and freedom to this day feels pretty damn amazing.
No questions today, but would love to hear your thoughts about this post! Have a great Thursday friends. <3
Sending my love as always.
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